It was a sad week for technological/electrical items in my apartment. After 35 years, my coffee maker has finally given up the ghost. From its more nefarious days warming my mother's tomato soup when she was in college to its glory days actually making coffee for me when I was in college and 1.5 years of grad school, it has served the Whitley family well. It deserves its rest.

However, to be without a functioning coffee maker simply would not do, so I went to Target to investigate what they had to offer. Believe you me when I say that over the past 35 years there have been substantial leaps made in coffee maker technology! From what I was used to, I did not even recognize what they were selling as coffee makers! I finally decided on an economical, but still proficient Mr. Coffee brand model. First, what you'll see is that this one comes with an on/off button. No more plugging and unplugging the maker to turn it on and off. The second thing you'll notice about my new coffee maker is that it has a 12 cup capacity, so that now when I have guests over, I don't have to make each guest their own, individual 4 cup pot. The third thing to catch your eye will likely be the glowing red L.C.D. clock. But whoa! It doesn't stop there! Not only does this thing tell time, but if you program it to do so by telling it what time you would like a pot and put in all the ingredients before hand, it'll make coffee all by itself!! Folks, this is incredible! I tried it out, a little skeptical, and set it for 7:15am. And I'll be damned if when I woke up the following morning there wasn't a fresh, piping hot pot of coffee greeting me in the kitchen! And I didn't have to do a thing! (Because I did all the work the previous night, and this was a new day, it doesn't count as work for today.) I'm in awe, faithful readers, sheer awe.

That episode did have its redeeming moments, though I was parted with a coffee maker that has been through hell and high water with me. The second woeful episode had a lesser redeeming moment, but still ok.

I spilled a Coke on my keyboard and it grew frustrated with me. Immediately I turned it over to drain it out and wiped it all down as best I could. Once the draining and wiping was complete, I tested all the keys and lo! they all still worked. A few were quite sticky, so I removed them individually and cleaned them with a Q-tip (which you’re not supposed to stick in your ears, but the warning label said nothing about computer keyboards). Now, we're typing at normal speed and all is well, but it was a scare. This is not the first time I've dumped a beverage on a computer. The last time involved a full glass of cranberry juice, a brand new laptop, and a fine, fine display of bullshitting. But, that's a story for another day for those of you readers not already privy.

-R